“…take every thought captive to obey Christ” 2 Corinthians 10:5b
Ok so let’s get real honest for a minute. Self-doubt is a big fat liar! Have you ever had one of those days where the inner dialogue just won’t stop? Like, where in the world did these thoughts creep in from? I had one of those days recently and it took hour by hour to take the thoughts captive. I was reminded just how important community is and how others have those same moments of self-doubt.
Educators are some of the most selfless people out there; constantly thinking of others and how to make this world just a little bit better. When I was honest with my a few of my colleagues, we were able to notice and process similar thoughts. Turns out that when someone is willing to open up and label some of the self-doubts, others are freed to join the conversation. Here are some of the truths we were able to uncover as we processed the internal stories we fed ourselves.
“Lies” Our Internal Dialogue Says Verse Truths
- “You are always caring for others and you have no one that cares for you.”
- Students & colleagues greeted me with smiles, hugs, and joy; asking me how I was.
- “You are not as great as that teacher, because they have an orderly line in the hallway.”
- Students have things to share, thoughts to get out, and excitement. Not every moment of the day is going to be silent; grace for interactions.
- “That teacher has so many great ideas and her class does so many fun things.”
- My students ask questions, take risks, and enjoy coming up with ideas for sharing what they are hearing in the read alouds.
- “If my students are doing independent activities, I am just letting them do busy work and they aren’t really learning.”
- Students need to learn time management, responsibility, and self-advocacy skills. If I do not build that into my structure they will not have the opportunity to learn the skills in a safe space.
I have found that when I have an intrusive thought, that are not based in truth, I need to take that thought captive. It is so much easier to let the thoughts run wild in our heads and navigate the truths on our own with the internal dialogue, than it is to let someone know a vulnerable side. I can tell you the power you have when you release the story to someone else is well worth the discomfort. In education, we don’t want others to see us struggle or look like we don’t have it all together. Can I let you in on something? Everyone is thinking that same thing. It’s when we, as educators, get real with a few trusted people that we can spark change within others to do the same. Vulnerability and gratitude are 2 powerful characteristics. Shame and unworthiness are the counterparts to that power. We get to choose what characteristic we want to carry each day.
I gave myself a challenge to write down the self-doubt and the truths. I also shared with trusted friends what I was going through in order to process and find truths, if I couldn’t find one. I challenge you to find 1 to 2 people you can let in on your inner dialogue.